


Shadow Walk

by bookwormally



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: M/M, Post-Kingdom Hearts III, Spoilers - Kingdom Hearts III, puts my toes in the direct canon fix it pool, this was going to be a oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-22
Updated: 2019-02-25
Packaged: 2019-11-03 15:21:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17880275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bookwormally/pseuds/bookwormally
Summary: Shadows whisper into Ventus's ear. He's either going mad...or Vanitas was being much more literal than he thought.Twoshot of Ventus and Vanitas after the ending.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [I Understand, You Understand](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17686373) by [Shaw](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shaw/pseuds/Shaw). 



> Well here we are again, it's always such a pleasure.
> 
> Inspired by the above fic and a few sketches I've seen around of shadowy Vanitas!

Ventus is losing his mind.

Not to say that he’s the only one, but after a second keyblade war and being reunited, hearts and bodies and families all, most people are healing.

He spent ten years healing in Sora’s heart, so really he should be winning what is definitely not a race here. There are no trauma olympics and Terra and Aqua would never want to measure their troubles against one another to see who suffered more. But if they did, Ven knows that he would be the best off.

Yet, he’s the one who keeps jumping at every shadow.

It’s not because they’re there, that he spent unknowable time walking through the Realm of Darkness like Aqua and can’t stand any shadows licking at his heels anymore. It’s not because he’s scared of them descending over his vision, that he won’t be able to see anything but the dark like Terra did, blind and mute and suffering as his body did unspeakable things to the worlds.

Ventus can’t exactly put his finger on why he jumps at the shadows, the way they shift and move with the sun.

Except he thinks they might be whispering to him.

So, again, he’s losing his mind.

The worlds are safe, Xehanort is gone, the darkness back in its place in the balance of all things. Everything is good. Ven repeats these things to himself as he lies in uninterrupted sunlight and refuses to let even the dappled light through the leaves of a tree touch him. Whatever he’s definitely not hearing isn’t real. It’s just...nightmares that won’t leave him alone.

He can avoid the shadows until he feels better and then, he’ll know for certain that it’s nothing. Ven inhales and closes his eyes, the sun warming his face. He’s going to end up almost as dark as Roxas at this rate, despite liberal application of sunscreen. Aqua’s noticed, her cool fingers cupping his chin as she studies him. He’s made excuses, loving the beach now and not wanting to spend too much time indoors.

They all have their scars and changes and his seem minor. She smiles and tells him to consider getting a sunhat before she lets him go.

At least the dark behind his eyes is safe. Ventus starts to doze, the wind in the branches and leaves the only noise in his ears.

The light shifts, a cloud drifts by, but Ven doesn’t take notice.

‘ _Ventus!’_ hisses directly into his ear and he jumps, flinging himself up to sitting, Wayward Wind gripped tightly in his hand.

His heart is pounding wildly and he whips his head back and forth. There’s no one nearby, not even the flash of color of a bird winging through the air.

He’s losing his fucking _mind_.

Ventus dismisses Wayward Wind and covers his face. It stings a little, sunburn, but he rubs his eyes until he’s seeing spots. He looks up, blinking them away, and still nothing appears. A dream.

He falls backward, landing on the grass again and groans. “It’s nothing, just the wind, or a dream.”

‘ _Your obvious brain damage_ ,’ someone hisses in his ear again.

Ven slams his keyblade into the ground beside him without thought. Gripping its handle and staring at the grass, he realizes exactly how stupid this is. There’s nothing there, nothing but his shadow.

His shadow, which has twin spots of sunlight that could be eyes, looks like its glaring at him. _I am the shadow that you cast. How much closer could I be?_

_He’s losing his mind._

Ven reaches out and puts a hand to his shadow, the ground cooler where the sunlight hasn’t hit in a while. He breathes in slowly and whispers, “Vanitas?”

There’s absolutely no answer, no hissing whisper, and the sunlight dancing over the head of his shadow is just that, falling between the pieces of his hair. Ventus breaks into laughter and bends forward. Stupid, so stupid. Vanitas wasn’t being literal. He’s gone, taking what used to be Ven’s darkness with him.

At least he doesn’t hurt anymore.

Ventus sighs and puts his forehead against the ground. “I’m stupid.”

‘ _No argument.’_ The whisper is less hissed this time, more flat, and Ven freezes in place.

He keeps his eyes shut and his head to the ground. “I’m an idiot,” he says.

‘ _Yes, you are._ ’

“My heart’s weak, I’m incomplete.”

‘ _Yes, exactly. I’ve been telling you for years_.’

“My dark half is an asshole who’s been fucking with me.”

‘ _You weren’t listening! I was practically screaming at you. I can’t believe you’ve added deafness on top of your other failings. The list is longer than you can count_.’

“Fuck you!” Ven fires back and opens his eyes. Now that he’s listening and hearing more than a word, he can tell it _is_ Vanitas’s voice. It’s a little hoarser, quieter than he ever was before, but it’s him.

He lifts his head just enough that grass isn’t poking him in the eye. His shadow ripples slightly underneath him, a glare and a scowl, and then steadies. Ven presses his hand to its center. “Hold on a second, I’m not pressing my face into the dirt for this.”

Ventus has no idea what’s going on, but his heart is pounding again. Not in fear, not this time.

He stands, brushing grass off his knees, and walks over to sit under one of the trees. The shadow is instantly cooler and he sighs as he pokes one of his cheeks. Definitely pink, Aqua’s going to slather him with aloe again tonight, lecturing him all the while. Oh well.

He drops into a tailor’s seat on the more shadowed side of the tree and leans against the trunk. His shadow is indistinguishable from that of the tree, but the whispers have been louder the closer to darkness he’s in. Ven runs his fingers over one of the roots. “Vanitas?”

‘ _What.’_

“Making sure I could hear you. You’re surly.” A smile breaks across Ven’s face, a lightness in his stomach that he refuses to name practically breaking out of him. “How long have you been yelling at me?”

‘ _Since you got back here. I thought you knew since you were getting all wide-eyed every time you looked at the dark. Pathetic._ ’

Ven draws a knee up and hooks his arm around it. “I thought I was losing my mind. I could barely hear it and there wasn’t anything to see.”

‘ _Blind **and** deaf, incredible combination _ . _I’m right here_.’

Ventus squints at the ground and beside him, but nothing’s there, not a hint of something more than regular shadows. “...Not to me.”

There’s what could be a sigh and then, ‘ _Of course_.’

Vanitas sounds tired, softer, and Ventus is struck by the sudden feeling that this could all be a sun-dazed dream. He could wake up in a moment, alone, Vanitas having well and truly faded away. It’s unnerving how quickly the bottom drops out of his stomach at the thought. He swallows and smiles, only forcing it a little.

“But like you said, I’m blind and stupid, so it’s probably me.”

‘ _Don’t lie to me, Ventus. I don’t like liars_.’ The hiss is back and Ven bites back a much realer smile.

“I’m not! I don’t have night vision, so give me some time for my eyes to adjust.” Ven squeezes his knee. “Did you wake up like this?”

A bird trills overhead and Ven looks up, trying to spot the distinctive black and white wings. It covers the silence from Vanitas. The bird is nowhere in sight and Ven rubs at his eyes, almost expecting Vanitas to ignore the question.

‘ _More or less,_ ’ comes the slow answer, right when Ven was about to ask something else. ‘ _I told you_.’

“I’m the shadow that you cast,” Ven repeats. “I know. I didn’t think you were actually being literal about it.”

‘ _I wasn’t. The universe is tormenting me._ ’ Vanitas sounds unsurprised and equally unamused.

Ven snorts and closes his eyes. He can almost imagine Vanitas seated beside him, slumped back against the tree, the distance between their shoulders just wide enough that they won’t brush accidentally. Vanitas’s mask is broken, like in his last moments, and Ven can’t even mentally will it away.

He keeps his eyes closed and imagines the breeze that blows at him is tugging the spikes of both of their hair. “Well...let me know if you need anything.”

Silence again and then another sigh.

‘ _You really are an idiot._ ’

And then Vanitas is gone, the very slight pulse at the edge of Ventus’s senses going dead.

Ven opens his eyes and looks up through the branches of the tree. “Yeah,” he agrees. “But Sora wasn’t the only one who thought you deserved another chance.”

* * *

 

Ventus is not losing his mind.

He can’t always tell when Vanitas is more present, watching him or trying to get his attention. But when the prickling feeling, the hissing whispers do catch his attention, he knows what they are and can give it his attention instead of deliberately blocking it out.

Vanitas won’t ever say it, but Ven can tell that his shadow is appreciative of the attention.

Even if he mostly uses it to call Ven an idiot for almost every action. Training, of course, draws Vanitas’s criticism, but he’s also taken the time to tell Ventus exactly how much his taste in food sucks. It doesn’t get under Ven’s skin like it used to, more making him smile because he knows Vanitas’s real frustration is from being in a limbo where he’s not whole but unable to do things himself either. Sometimes Vanitas’s frustration is so strong Ven would swear he can feel it burning against his feet.

He tries to listen closer at that point and do what Vanitas is not-so-subtly demanding. Half the time, Vanitas snaps something about pity and vanishes. The other half, Vanitas radiates smugness for being _right_. It’s tiring, but tolerable.

Terra and Aqua have no idea. They’re both glad that he’s not cooking himself in the sun anymore, but he can tell they wonder at the change, that they might have heard him talking to himself in his room as they pass by in the hall. He’ll tell them...soon. When he’s figured out what to do about this.

Because this is untenable. Vanitas cannot stay his shadow forever.

But is there enough of him to be whole again? Is it _safe_ to let Vanitas be whole and free to roam the worlds again?

Ventus doesn’t know. So, he’s stuck with Vanitas hissing from his shadow, half there, half gone, and always leaving Ventus’s heart aching when he disappears from his awareness. He doesn’t know why it aches.

He lies in bed one night, considering the feeling, and can’t trace it back to its source. Is it sympathy? He can’t imagine being so insubstantial, reduced to almost nonexistence. He can’t imagine most of what Vanitas has suffered through. His vague memories of his training under Master Xehanort bring terrible things to mind.

And then there are his memories of the Unversed. _They are what I feel - a hoard of fledgling emotions under my control._ Vanitas’s own emotions had been used to attack him and his friends, ripping and tearing with glowing red eyes.

Ven still remembers watching in horror as they grew out of Vanitas’s shadow, all the monsters they’d been facing. The Floods wrapped around him and Vanitas taunted him; Ventus had been too angry to consider it all then.

Now, in the dark, when he can feel Vanitas watching him or just being, Ven finds he has a great many questions. “Vanitas,” he calls softly.

Two spots of light on the wall, moonlight reflected off of something, twist toward him. ‘ _What?_ ’

“Was there...ever an Unversed that was happy?” _Were you ever happy?_

‘ _That’s a stupid question._ ’ Vanitas’s voice is harsh in the dark and Ven squeezes his eyes shut. Vanitas is against his wall, arms crossed, and glaring at him. His eye is a glowing gold spot, the other half of his mask hides the second.

“You say that about _every_ question.”

‘ _You never have a smart question_.’ The Vanitas in his mind’s eye shifts against the wall and looks out the window instead. ‘ _What are the Unversed made of, Ventus? I know a master told you_.’

“Negativity,” Ven says softly.

‘ _Exactly_. _Has anyone ever felt happiness and had it be negativity? Glee at causing trouble for others, for causing them pain? That’s negative. Happiness is not_.’

Ven opens his eyes and rolls over to stare up at the ceiling. It’s easier than looking at the Vanitas in his head, who looks smaller in the moonlight as his voice goes flatter and flatter. The stars he stuck up there with Terra and Aqua glow dimly. His voice feels as distant as the real stars when he speaks. “But you’re _not_ just negativity.”

‘ _If you think that’s true, you’re an even bigger idiot than I thought._ ’ Vanitas sighs. ‘ _How do you think the master brought me back?_ ’

He never thought about it. There was so much time travel to wrap his head around that he just assumed that Vanitas had been snatched out of time as well. Ven frowns. “Negativity?”

_‘Ding, ding, ding. That world of monsters was the perfect place for me to collect all the negativity needed to make me stronger than anyone else_ . _I am negativity, just like I am the darkness to your light._ ’

“But I feel negative emotions all the time. That has nothing to do with light or darkness.” Ven rolls onto his side and stares at the wall where he can almost see Vanitas. “If you’ve never felt happiness than it’s...because of what you’ve lived through, not because you _can’t_.”

The moonlight spots stare back at them and then noticeably dart away. ‘ _My master-_.’

“And you can quit calling him that. He’s not your master, Vanitas, not anymore. He never acted like a master should. Fuck him.” Ven sits up, suddenly furious with the world and everything in it. “Call him what he is: a fucking jackass!”

‘ _Ventus..._ ’ Vanitas sounds surprised and then furious too. ‘ _What would you know?! You with your perfect life and your perfect friends! He was all I had after he separated us. You never needed me! Not like I need you! Fuck you!_ ’

The light bulb in the small star-shaped light he got for the nights, _for Vanitas to have something to appear from_ , shatters. The dark feels empty and cold, a vacuum left after Vanitas disappears and takes his rage with him.

Ven exhales and puts his face on his knees. “Stupid. If I didn’t need you…”

If he didn’t need Vanitas, the thought of him being truly gone wouldn’t leave him aching.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brief thought on Xehanort's training methods in this chapter, just as a head's up. Dude was an asshole.

Vanitas avoids him for a couple days. Ventus can feel him watching sometimes, but there are no whispers and anytime he looks, Vanitas vanishes. It’s frustrating. He wants to _talk_ to Vanitas, maybe apologize. They can’t understand each other if they don’t talk.

More than anything, that’s what Ventus wants. He wants to understand Vanitas and he wants Vanitas to understand him. They made their choices, but their reasons why...they never got the chance to talk about those. Words unsaid, Ventus thinks a lot about them and what could have changed.

Could he have stopped Terra from falling into Xehanort’s trap? Could he have gotten Master Eraqus to listen? All he can do is guess and hope that their happy ending is _right_. They’ve earned it, haven’t they? He even reached out his hand to Vanitas...even if it was rejected. They did everything they could to set things right.

That doesn’t make it easier in the middle of the night when he’s lying alone in his bed, in the dark, unable to stop the tears. They fall silently, soaking into his pillow. Ventus couldn’t name their source if he tried. There’s so much that hurts. Master Eraqus, his friends’ pain, both crawl up his back and choke him. Sora and his friends, their suffering, Sora’s absence from their smiling circle, broken shards that stab at him.

Sometimes things just hurt. Ventus cries and breathes through the pain and wonders if this is what Vanitas felt all the time. If he could shove it out and away to hurt someone else...Ven can see the appeal.

It’s no surprise when he’s distracted during training the next day. He didn’t get to sleep for hours and it was far from restful, hands reaching out from the darkness to drag him down or the feeling of being slowly pulled in half keeping him in a daze until the sun rose.

Terra sends him flying, a heavy hit that Ven should have blocked easily but was too slow to react to.

Aqua’s already there when he hits the ground, cure dancing from her fingers as she asks if he’s alright, her voice too high to be calm. Ventus shakes the daze off and smiles easily. He’s fine, he’s fine! The sun was in his eyes and he was distracted, no need to worry.

He retakes his stance in front of Terra. Terra tightens his grip on his keyblade, but his swing is slower this time. Ven blocks it and strikes back hard enough to stagger him. If they’re going to train, he wants to train. It’ll be a good distraction from his tired mind.

Terra smiles slightly and takes the hint. He ups the pressure, forcing Ventus to move around and work for his return strikes. Getting inside Terra’s guard takes work and it’s always a rush when he succeeds. Getting inside _Aqua’s_ guard is a feat he has yet to accomplish without dirty tactics, but she’s a master so...he thinks that’s fair.

Ends of the Earth strikes the ground and several pillars of rock shoot up. Ven dodges one and leaps off another, using its momentum to push further into the air. The others can’t reach and he twists to dive towards Terra. Terra yanks his keyblade from the ground, swinging it to try and block, but Ven knows he can get around it.

And then a cloud shifts away from the sun, light brightening, and Terra’s eyes go gold. Ven freezes two feet from collision, hand locked around his keyblade. Terra’s block is now a swing at his head and it’s Xehanort back again and there’s nothing he can-!

Something dark surges between them, rising from the ground. Terra’s keyblade smacks into it, halting in the darkness and Ven tumbles past him.

He hits the dirt, scraping his arms up in the process.  
  
“Ven!” Two voices shout out and there are footsteps running toward him.

But he can’t breathe, can’t think, friends or enemies?

‘ _I_ _diot_ ,’ someone hisses. Something cool brushes over his face and he squints his eyes open.

For a moment, Vanitas is there, bent over him and unmasked. His frown isn’t the angry scowl Ven knows so well, but something else. His hand touches Ventus’s cheek again. ‘ _Always keep a block up._ ’

Ventus blinks and Vanitas is gone. Aqua and Terra reach him, kneeling down and helping him sit up. They babble questions and apologies, but Ven has to grab onto both of them and ask them for a quiet moment so he can think.

He breathes in, as he was taught for meditation, and when he’s done it a few times, he feels better. The pulse of Vanitas nearby helps more than he can say.

Aqua and Terra each have a hand to his shoulders and he squeezes their arms. “I’m okay. The sun it...Terra, I’m sorry. I thought, your eyes…”

“Oh!” Terra blinks several times and puts a hand to his cheek. “They’re not...are they?”

Aqua shakes her head. “You’re okay. _We’re_ okay. He’s gone.” She takes Terra’s hand and squeezes it, making them into a circle. Ven is glad for it, glad that they can all be here for reassurance. Vanitas too, even if Terra and Aqua don’t know it.

Like a mind-reader, Aqua frowns a little. “Was that darkness yours, Terra? You used it to stop your strike.”

“I didn’t have time,” Terra says slowly. “My first instinct is still to pull my blows physically. I was only just realizing Ven was going to get hit when that happened. I don’t know where it came from…”

They both look at Ventus as if he should know. Well, he does, but...is this the time to explain? Won’t they be hurt that he didn’t tell them about his problems, about Vanitas literally shadowing him? He looks at the ground. Not talking to each other is what caused so many issues before. He trusts them; he loves them.

“It was mine,” he confirms. “My darkness.”

And he can feel them trade a look over his head, Aqua’s fingers tightening on his shoulder.

~~Paranoia~~ Fear swamps him. They’ll try to rip it away, try to rip Vanitas away before he can try again to possess him or corrupt him or something. Ven presses his lips together, biting back further explanation.

Terra breaks the silence. “That...makes sense. Nobody is completely free of darkness. Your heart recovering would bring some back.”

“That was quite powerful,” Aqua says, voice tight. “What if-.” She cuts herself off and Ven looks up at her. She’s trading another look with Terra.

_‘They’re going to talk about it privately. They think they’ll upset you or some such shit._ ’ Vanitas's voice, stronger now Ventus notes, is a harsh scoff. ‘ _Poor little Venty-Wenty, you’ll never grow up in their eyes._ ’

_Asshole_ , Ventus thinks particularly hard in Vanitas’s direction. He doesn’t know if the snort that follows is because Vanitas heard him or if he’s still scoffing at his friends.

Aqua stands, helping them both back to their feet. “I think that’s enough training for now. Let’s clean up and get lunch prepared.”

“Yeah,” Ventus agrees softly. They’re going to talk without him regardless, so he might as well make it easy. He hugs them both tightly and then jogs toward the hall. “I’ll see you in the kitchen, Terra!”

Terra lifts a hand and waves, already looking at Aqua.

Fear grabs at him the second he’s in the shadowed hall. Ventus jogs down it, around the corner and out of sight, and then leans his head against the wall. Vanitas is still there and for a second, Ventus wishes he could reach out and touch him. “They both got so hurt by the darkness. I don’t want them to think I don’t respect that.”

‘ _Are you asking me for advice? Idiot, you’re supposed to be friends. I thought that meant happy trust and fun times. Not whatever the fuck this is. What would they possibly do to_ **_you_**?’ Vanitas sneers the words at him and when Ven glances over his shoulder, his shadow is in the shape of his dark half. Vanitas’s arms are folded over his chest, mask still gone, and he’s rolling his eyes.

Ven blinks and he stays, a little transparent, a shadow with features. “Um,” he says brilliantly. “I don’t know. That’s what...that’s what worries me. They might want to help, especially...especially if they find out it’s you.”

Vanitas quirks an eyebrow. ‘ _Smart. I could kill them if I got my power back_.’

“But you had power and didn’t do anything,” Ven replies. He straightens up and puts his back to the wall. They stare at each other from opposite sides of the hall. “You protected me, nothing more.”

Vanitas looks to the side, breaking eye contact. ‘ _If you get hurt, I get hurt. It was self-preservation_.’

But his blocks had always had retaliation before.

Ven puts his hands to the wall, pressing them flat so he doesn’t try to reach out and watch Vanitas disappear. “I guess so,” he says softly. “Thank you, Vanitas.”

_‘Remember what I said. Keep your block up always. Next time I won’t save your ass so the lesson sticks_.’

“I won’t forget.” Ven eyes Vanitas and wonders how many times Xehanort made lessons _stick_. “If I get up early, when it’s darker, can you show me some techniques?” The question jumps out of his mouth, motivated by only the feeling in his gut.

_He wants to see more of Vanitas._

Vanitas glances at him from the corner of his eye, a bit of glowing sunlight. He looks away, arms still crossed. ‘ _Thought you couldn’t see me_.’

“I can now. Ever since you saved me.” Ven’s lips curl up into a slight smile.

_‘Don’t say it like that,_ ’ Vanitas says, and if it were anyone else, Ven would say they were embarrassed. ‘ _Look at this then!_ ’

Ven rolls his eyes at the bird being flipped at him. “You’re a fucking child.”

‘ _Fuck you too, Ventus._ ’ Vanitas snarls at him, baring one of his canines with a curled lip. ‘ _If you can manage to wake up and keep your eyes open, I’ll show you how to really fight_.’

It makes Ven’s smile grow all the way across his face. “Great. I’ll be ready tomorrow!”

The last thing he sees is Vanitas shaking his head and maybe, almost smiling.

* * *

 

Ventus was clearly out of his mind when he asked Vanitas to train him.

Showing up to breakfast exhausted and a little sweaty is nothing but suspicious. He plays it off as taking up some morning exercise which gets him another look traded between his friends. He’s really starting to rack them up as he lies and lies for Vanitas.

He needs to tell them; he needs to trust them.

He needs Vanitas to stay, glowing yellow eyes in his shadow and the dark between the moonlight in his room _._

He’ll have to explain eventually, when he’s able to move even faster than before. They’ll know what it is, a twist on Vanitas’s ability to teleport around a place. They’ll panic. He has to tell them.

Ventus picks at his breakfast, rolling a blueberry over the top of his pancakes. His thoughts are going in similar circles. Terra and Aqua aren’t talking either, neither of them the kind to indulge in morning chatter. That was all Ventus and their Master, ready to face the day. He can face this.

He sighs and looks up at them. Terra has both hands wrapped around a cup of tea as he squints at the book lying beside his plate. Aqua looks serene, or maybe just asleep in her chair, one hand holding a fork against her plate, skewering nothing. It’s a regular morning, nothing to disturb them.

The fear that holds his lips shut sickens him. Ventus opens his mouth and forces the words to come.

“When Vanitas died, his darkness came back to me.”

Terra and Aqua’s heads jerk up and around to him, Aqua’s fork falling to the side of her plate with a clatter. Ventus could have set the table on fire and it’d be less of a surprise. Terra glances at Aqua, Ventus braces for another _look_ , and then Terra snorts. She glares at him, tossing her napkin. “Terra!”

“You dropped your fork!”

“It was not that funny.”

“It was,” Terra says with a grin. He turns to Ventus. “We thought that’s what happened. He was part of you first.”

Ventus slowly puts a hand to his heart, suddenly aware of Vanitas staring at him from the shadows by the door. How long he’s been there, Ventus couldn’t say. “Yeah, we were one heart. We _were_ , we’re not anymore. Since we got home…”

Gold eyes pierce him like blades of light. Ventus meets them and stares back. “Since we got home, he’s been with me. He was the one who stopped Terra’s keyblade.”

Terra sets his cup down and Aqua’s hands are pressed flat to the table. Their silence rings through the room.

Ventus keeps his gaze on Vanitas. “I’m going to find a way to bring him back and give him a real second chance.”

Shock flits across Vanitas’s face. He shakes his head and then disappears.

Terra reaches out first, putting his hand to Ventus’s shoulder. “I trust you, Ven. If you think he deserves it, then I’ll help.”

Aqua is quiet a moment longer, staring at the table. When she looks up, her eyes are wet. “I won’t be able to trust him, but I do trust you, Ven. Let us know if there’s anything we can do.”

Ven reaches out and takes one of her hands, squeezing when he feels her shaking. “There’s one thing I need to do and you can both help. I need to be stronger.”

* * *

 

‘ _Why?_ ’

“Because you deserve it.”

‘ _I tried to kill your friends. I helped Xehanort trap Terra. I almost killed us both_.’

“You didn’t know any other way. He gave you one path and you followed it. If you recognize that your actions were wrong now...”

‘ _...I was going to kill him, you know. Once we had the x-blade, I was going to kill him_ . _The only thing I hated more in all the universe...was you. You and your friends and your happiness. I never had it. I only hurt._ ’

“Vanitas…this is why. You deserve to feel what it’s like to feel something else. All you have to do...is try.”

‘ _Try and be you? Not going to happen._ ’

“No, not me. Be yourself, whoever that is.”

‘ _And if that person isn’t one you and your friends like? I’ve never been anything but myself...not since_ **_we_ ** _stopped being_ **_I_**.’

“It won’t be perfect. You still deserve the chance to be someone without Xehanort.”

‘ _..._ ’

“Vanitas...I want you to be here. Not as my shadow, not because we’re tied together. But, because you choose to. For real, this time.”

‘ _I...I’m still darkness, Ventus. That won’t ever change_.’

“Maybe not, but there’s no light without darkness. We go together.”

‘ _We do. This is how things should be. Our heart is meant to be one._ ’

“Not anymore. We’ve grown since then, Vanitas, in all sorts of ways.”

‘... _Why did you ask your friends about getting stronger? You don’t want to make the x-blade_.’

“Someone once told me the closer you get to the light, the greater your shadow becomes. If I’m stronger, than you will be too. Then, maybe...you can come back.”

‘ _Idiot_ . _What would you even do with me back besides fight?’_

“That’s easy. Come here and I’ll tell you.”

Vanitas’s steps are soundless as he crosses the room and sits on the side of Ventus’s bed.

Ventus reaches out and takes Vanitas’s hand, barely able to feel it. He smiles at Vanitas, the brightest light in the night, and leans in to whisper to him.

“I’ll show you the world without him; I’ll show you all the choices you really have. I’ll stand beside you, Vanitas, because you’re my other half. I want to be at your side. My heart aches without you...”

A shadow’s touch isn’t solid, but he can feel it all the way to his heart as Vanitas squeezes his hand.

‘ _Mine always has_.'


End file.
